Written by Ven Baxter
Some of the greatest teachers and healers in history have famously been murdered–presumably by “negative” people. Jesus and Socrates both come to mind.
Presumably, these great teachers and healers did not heal these negative people, despite being close enough to them to be killed by them.
These negative people who would murder a great teacher or healer were, presumably, hurt people. After all, as they say, “Hurt people hurt people.”
Presumably, “hurting people” would include murdering great teachers or healers–instead of being healed by them.
Hurting people does indeed cause negativity. Nevertheless, those hurt (“negative”) people still have free will. For this reason, not only is it impossible to make a negative person positive, i.e. to heal a hurt person, but it would be wrong to do so unless you had that person’s consent.
In real life, however, when someone wants to (emotionally) heal a “negative” person, the negative person is often only seeking to take and use some of that person’s positive energy to alleviate his or her own suffering. In other words, the purpose of taking the positive person’s positive energy is only to make the negative person feel better temporarily, not to “heal” them at all!
This is practically the definition of a Narcissist: someone who takes positive energy from another person in order NOT to heal themselves.
This energetic (emotional) transfer depletes the other person’s positive energy, “spreading” the negativity to himself or herself. The negative person now expends the newly-acquired positive energy like fuel, while the positive person must restore it somehow.
This is emotional vampirism at work.
Human beings are indeed pure positive energy at our core, but the way to heal negativity is not to douse it with positive energy, as in dousing a fire with water. The way to heal a negative (hurt) person is to get rid of negativity through energetic (emotional) RELEASE–and this is an inside job.
This is how a negative person’s own pure positive energy can come forth from the core–in place of the negativity that now has been released like a champagne bottle’s cork.
Other people can help facilitate this inner process, if (and only if) the negative person is willing, but anyone who stays too close to a lot of negativity, for too long, is at risk of “acquiring” negativity in the process. This is why teachers and healers must replenish their own positive energy in various ways if they are to remain positive themselves.
It’s also why survivors of Narcissistic abuse frequently end up with “fleas” to get rid of. These are negative qualities acquired from the Narcissist, through the transfer of positive energy to him or her, in an attempt to heal a negative (hurt) person. But the Narcissist is only pretending to want to be healed, in order to keep the positive energy flowing freely…to the Narcissist.
Many people have sacrificed themselves trying to heal other people’s negativity, literally for nothing–except a lesson on this subject, if they’re lucky. Then they learn that they can only heal themselves.
And then, guess what?
They DO.
Ven Baxter lives in Florida, where he works as a canoe outfitter, teaches, writes, and enjoys being father to his three children. You can find this article on his blog, Ven Baxter – Go deep into the nooks and crannies of life and the human experience…
There are so many people just like you who have taken a stand against their abusers. They’ve gotten a taste of the good life–and that taste of freedom is too sweet to turn back to the lives they had before.
Recovering from narcissistic abuse is hard, and it’s okay to admit you need help. If you’re ready to go deeper now, check out my therapist-approved online program for narcissistic abuse recovery. This program is so effective, counselors and therapists refer their clients to it and it’s also shared in shelters across the U.S. You can see for yourself here.
