For most of my adult life, I had a successful banking career. After growing tired of the rat race, I left 20 years in the financial industry behind and went back to college to pursue my teaching degree in 2006. I started my student teaching in Egypt during the first uprising in 2011. I graduated during the summer of the same year and have worked in my local school district since.
But, what do I really have to show for all of these accomplishments? I’m now 42. My children have grown up with other people while I worked. I’ve sacrificed an untold number of memories and my dreams to live the “successful” life. You know the one….the good job, the decent salary. All in the name of paying the bills. Perhaps you’ve lived the “successful” life, too.
I’ve come to realize that what I considered success for most of my life was just doing what I thought was the right thing to do.
Lately, I’ve felt a gnawing emptiness. I feel I’ve let my years pass by meaninglessly. I’m back in an apartment, living on a Teaching Assistant’s salary, with little feeling of value at my school (which is common for educators), and an urgent sense that I need to do something different. Something that makes me feel alive. Success is different for everyone. For me, it means whatever makes my soul sing. I’ve done what I was supposed to do. Now, I will care for my soul.
I think I will try my hand at being a writer and other creative “stuff”. After all, it’s been my lifelong dream. And, what good is life if we haven’t been true to ourselves? As Wayne Dyer says…..Don’t die with your music still in you.
Life…..here I come!
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