When it comes to researching Narcissistic behaviors, “lying” is one that tops the charts. Women and men all over the world are catching on to their abusive partner’s game, and they want to gain some advantage.
Only, the sad truth of the matter is, there is no practical method to determine if a Narcissist is lying. One won’t be able to tell by observing the Narcissist. There is no point in trying to read their body language or watch the movement of their eyes. A Narcissist would probably pass a polygraph because they’ve become so adept at lying. In many cases, they believe their own lies.
The only logical way to approach the issue is to use past data to make a hypothesis. For instance, anyone who’s been with a Narcissist for a lengthy amount of time would be able to deduce, based on past physical data, that his or her Narcissistic partner lies approximately 80-90% of the time.
The only time a Narcissist will tell the truth is when they will benefit from doing so. E.g.:
However, even the above scenarios which seem innocent and convincing, could be based on lies:
Narc-check: I once knew of a Narcissist who’d go to his partner every year with the personal property bill for their car. He always had an excuse as to why he couldn’t pay it. Since his partner was the one who held steady employment, she always paid the bill. It was later discovered that the Narcissist told his sister, brother, and parents the same thing in regards to not being able to foot the bill. So, for a $400 bill, he would come away with $1200 in his pocket.
There is absolutely no way to ever really know if a Narcissist is telling the truth. Unlike you and me, they don’t see the necessity in it. In fact, honesty is a foreign concept to them and one reserved for chumps. In their mind, life is a game and the only goal is to win.
3 Examples of Lies Told by the Narcissist
Narcissists are able to successfully criticize other people to the point of detriment because they do it in a way that comes across as genuine. For example, during a smear campaign they are waging against someone, they will make their concerns seem valid…much in the way that political opponents do right before Election Day.
One of the most common gaslighting tactics is to insist they didn’t say something that you heard them say with your own ears. If you call them out on it, they will pretend that you heard them wrong, they were just joking, or you perceived it the wrong way. This is usually followed up by, “You are the only person who misunderstands me”.
Gaslighting can also consist of their taking, stealing, and moving objects of importance to the victim. Examples: car keys, cell phones, money, receipts, business cards, heirlooms, and toys that belong to the children. In more insidious cases, they will hide or get rid of medications the victim needs in order to function and live, while insisting the victim lost them.
The fact that you’re reading this article probably means you have discovered your partner is a bold liar. This is the only thing that will remain constant in a relationship with a Narcissist. Therefore, you must always assume the worst in this respect.
How do you know when a Narcissist is lying? Usually, when their lips are moving and sound is coming out.