Let Me Reach with Kim Saeed
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How to Do No Contact Like a Boss!

"How To Do No Contact Like a Boss!" is now available!

Anyone who is trying to leave an abusive relationship needs to impose very specific tactics in order to break free, heal, and move on to a better life. Narcissists and emotional manipulators will do anything to get back in.   While their unethical behavior should serve as a reminder of why one is enforcing No Contact in the first place, it’s often hard to do when one is constantly bombarded with calls, emails, texts, social media notifications and even in-person visits

How To Do No Contact Like a Boss! takes the reader from the initial planning stage, exit strategies, the moment of No Contact, what to expect in the days that follow, and how to deal with a persistent and/or abusive Ex who refuses to respect one’s request for No Contact.

I chose this cover design after much contemplation – as it really conveys the strength of a woman who is able to maintain her position in the face of persistence.  I was inspired to write this book because so many people struggle with No Contact, which is the first crucial step in obtaining freedom from toxic relationships.

Order your copy here! 

Author Bio

Kim Saeed, B. Ed., is a survivor and thriver after narcissistic abuse specializing in No Contact coaching, dating after narcissistic abuse, enlightened relationships, and self-care. She is the author of the recovery education blog Let Me Reach.

Kim has a multidisciplinary background including expertise in teaching, banking, organizational development, HR, research, and database management.

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29 comments
Bee says April 18, 2018

Hi Kim. Thank you for your reassuring words and guidance. After nearly 5 years of emotional and physical abuse, uncertainty, and loneliness, I finally got away from my Narcissist. Six months prior, however, we purchased a cat together. My cat truly gave me the strength to survive, to know that there’s one constant in my life. Ironically, she’s also the reason I sustained the abuse a little longer. I was afraid my narcissist would take the cat away from me like she has everything else I cared about. As predicted, she did just that. Five days ago I came home to find my clothes and shoes in bags outside and all of the locks changed. My cat locked away inside the house, and my ex away at work. I feel so terribly guilty for not being able to sneak my cat away sooner. I’m physically sick to my stomach and can’t even bear to process what has happened. I’m torn because I don’t want to be a part of this reality any longer with my ex, yet my cat still lives in that reality. I’m overwhelmed with sadness, guilt, uncertainty. My cat and I shared a bond so special, one I’ve never felt before with any living creature. I’ve reluctantly been no contact for 5 days with my ex. But she’s emailed and texted me several times in these past few days saying I can keep the cat because she knows how much I love her and how our cat loves me. How our cat has been lonely because I’m all she knows. How my Narcissist has to work a lot and our cat needs someone to pay attention to her…etc. I feel the worst I’ve ever felt. Worse than any of the emotional and physical wounds she inflicted in the past. I question whether she would even follow through with such a gesture? All of my instincts say no. She seems to love the cat very much. Is it mimicking the course our relationship took? Is my cat safe? Should I break no contact in order to get my cat out of there? Pets are much like children to their owners, but there is no information I can find anywhere to help cope with this type of situation, when a pet is involved. Can you lend any advice?

Reply
    Kim Saeed says April 18, 2018

    Hi Bee,

    Given the situation, I think you could make an exception to secure your cat and then implement No Contact for good. Wishing you all the best.

    Kim XoXo

    Reply
LC says July 20, 2015

Thanks again for this resource & your blog.

After 2+ years of lies, cheating, confusion, manipulation, gaslighting… allowing him to live with me, physically & emotionally abuse me, & suck the ‘self’ out of me… I finally kicked the N out of my home about 6 months ago. I’ve been legitimately NO CONTACT, not just “no response,” for 7 days now.

NAS is truly an addiction, which makes recovery a challenge, especially when in combination with a codependent personality, but I’m never going back. I’ve re-claimed my life. Thank you, Kim, for your helpful & inspiring insights.

I’ve read your book on Kindle, but I’d love to have it in print. Are there any plans to publish it in paperback?

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Paul Haywood says April 14, 2015

Is a physical book going to be published?

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cbled32 says April 2, 2015

Kim Saeed, My name is Carrie and I am a victim of the “Almighty Narcissist”! I finally got away by only the grace of God. I know it will be a long road to complete recovery for my scared soul. I have completed the 7day No Contact. Actually this past Tuesday made TWO WEEKS NO CONTACT! Some days have been excruciatingly hard. I’ve done so much research on this type of behavior along with the many other personality disorders and to the point of once I’m on the road to complete healing taking Psychology courses to be a counselor dealing directly with narcissist and those with the more extreme personality disorders because most counsellors aren’t trained in this special disorder. And coming out of this type of situation and my heart goes out to those who are still stuck in the cycle of mental abuse. Now with all that being said, I am in the beginning healing process and still my mind tries to find good and it’s so hard to retrain your brain to always be cautious and not always look for the good. My exNarcissist has made many attempts to contact me through friends and leaving voicemails since he is Blocked. He says he will do whatever to have me back and that he loves me and that he was wrong and he knows he treated me terrible and that he wants to change and maybe counseling will help he says. He says he is willing to whatever and anything for us. So what are some thoughts on this? Thank you!

Reply
    Kim Saeed says June 6, 2015

    Hi cbled32 – I apologize for the delay as I’ve just read your comment. I hope you are still going strong with No Contact and kudos for enrolling in psychology classes. The world definitely needs more therapists who understand the damage that narcissistic abuse can do.

    Regarding your Ex trying to contact you, it sounds like a typical hoovering attempt. Unless a Narc is of the cerebral ilk, they almost always come back claiming to have had The Divine Epiphany. I can’t tell you the number of times I fell for that with my Ex.

    Reply
CrazyKat1963 says November 19, 2014

I have a question for you… in our case, my husband is trying to have no contact with his mother, who is the narcissist in his life. Would your book be a good read for him, or is it mainly directed to couples?

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    Kim Saeed says November 19, 2014

    CrazyKat1963, it’s mainly written around romantic relationships. But, there are others who’ve had to cut their parents out of their lives. A good place to start would be to Google, “Adult Child of Narcissist”. I hope that might help get your hubby started <3 Good luck. (I do have tips for the process of No Contact, but not the specific parent/child dynamic as it relates to abusive relationships).

    Reply
      CrazyKat1963 says November 19, 2014

      Thank you so much for you reply. After months of therapy, my husband has been diagnosed as a sex addict, but not a narcissist. He is in the process of dealing with his emotions of cutting his parents out of his life and finally coming to the realization that his mother is a narcissist, and he has a lot of changes he must make in his life. Sometimes kids just do not see their parents as real, fallible people. Well, he is no kid anymore and needs to stop acting like one. Thanks again, I will definitely keep searching.

      Reply
selfcarehaven says May 11, 2014

Awesome! I cannot wait to read this! =) (@selfcarehaven from Twitter)

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    Kim Saeed says May 11, 2014

    🙂 Yay! Thanks for the vote of encouragement!

    Reply
Mimi Pollier says March 25, 2014

Hi Kim:
Did you get by last comment made on the 24th? Thank you Mimi

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Mimi Pollier says March 24, 2014

Hi Kim:
I have been trying hard to remain no contact with the N. but just notice last week he was up on my property fixing a fence but i was not home.. What hurts and confuses me he just left me again brutally and the things he said i just don’t think i could ever forget for this OW.. this Ow that he has been going back and fourth with.. why even bother stopping and fixing the fence. he dumps me over and over for her.. i am really going no contact. i know if i try to call him again he will only make me feel so horrible about myself.. so i keep away from my phone.. i know i can not reason with him.. about anything.. i am staying away from him. that’s what he wants.
Any words of encouragement for insight as to why he was up on the property. Thank you Mimi… Take care

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StrongerSoulSurvivor says March 23, 2014

Fantastic Kim! So exciting. You’ve so much wisdom to share on the subject, I hope this is the first of many books to come.

Reply
    Kim Saeed says March 23, 2014

    Thank you, StrongerSoul 🙂 That means a lot!

    Reply
navigator1965 says March 23, 2014

Wow–what a fantastic cover design and execution. An absolute winner, Kim. Congratulations.

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    Kim Saeed says March 23, 2014

    Thanks, Nav 🙂

    Reply
Lee says March 23, 2014

Good luck on the book launch!

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    Kim Saeed says March 23, 2014

    Thanks, Lee 🙂

    Reply
bethbyrnes says March 23, 2014

Wonderful! What an accomplishment Kim. Good for you, helping others.

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    Kim Saeed says March 23, 2014

    Thank you, Beth! You know, the funny thing is that I always dreamed that my first book would be fiction. I have a couple of unfinished drafts floating around…but then, this 🙂

    Reply
L D says March 23, 2014

Congrats, Kim!!

________________________________

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    Kim Saeed says March 23, 2014

    Thank you, LD 🙂 I’m highly excited about it!

    Reply
happinessweekly says March 23, 2014

Yay! Well done Kim!! How many books have you released to date? Would love to get my hands a copy if I can. Trying to make the whole “Narcissism” concept more widely known in Australia. 🙂

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    Kim Saeed says March 23, 2014

    Awww, thank you. Actually, this will be my first book 🙂 I am working on another one that I need to rewrite, so it will probably come out later in the year…

    Thanks again for your kind comment 😀

    Reply
alm383 says March 23, 2014

هذا اول الطريق الصحيح للتوعية الجادة بعيد عن الكتبات المائعة
هذا هو دور المراءة الحقيقي بتوفيق

Reply
    Kim Saeed says March 23, 2014

    😀 Thanks!

    Reply
betternotbroken says March 23, 2014

Congratulations. I cannot wait to read it.

Reply
    Kim Saeed says March 23, 2014

    😀 Thanks!

    Reply
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