LMR Saturday Survivor – Inspirational Stories from the Front Line

By Kim Saeed | Initiating No Contact

Sep 06
effects of narcissistic abuse

~Submitted by Scott Dougall~

In a way it takes a while for you to believe that you suffer from something like this.  PTSD feels to be something that you suffer from when something real and horrific happens – like maybe to a soldier in battle or similar – not a middle aged man trying to enjoy flying his hang glider getting bothered by some self-important tosser and his minion followers.

Then when you realize all those revolving thoughts in your mind are the manifestation of cPTSD after years of manipulative underhanded cowardly abuse that resulted in your social disconnectedness and the depressing reality that represents in any person’s life, and then you get angry at the tosser who did this.

Then, eventually, after going NC, whatever the cost that represents to you in the short term, you find your mind becoming clearer of these revolving thoughts evaporating – I have a therapist now too who helps me reconstruct myself and define a way forward, but it is at this stage when you realize you were really suffering from this PTSD thing you could not come to believe before.

This is real, in a deep sense such that it is inescapably real, not something you can brush away – I think all you can do is accept that you have PTSD and cPTSD and not worry how it got there – the cause – the abuser is an irrelevance – no – what you need to do is accept this and then day by day be kind to yourself – seek happy people – happy memories – write about them – take yourself into peaceful places and enjoy the beauty of each moment.. for me this is my days now – seeking peace.

Feeling joy when I realize I am healing.

 

Do you have an inspirational story?  Feel free to submit your victory to kim@letmereach.com!

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(7) comments

tpalmas September 8, 2014

I’m in the early stages of trying to go no contact. I feel miserable that this woman has a hold of me after she discarded me at the drop of a hat. She will answer a text from me every now and then but other than that she has no interest in talking to me. She was the only one I could talk to constantly on a daily basis in the beginning. Now I find it hard to talk to others to distract myself from her.

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tpalmas September 8, 2014

I’m in the early stages of recovery trying to go no contact. I feel miserable that this woman has a hold of me. She discarded me and doesn’t initiate contact with me. I wish there was a switch I could flip to get her off my mind like she did with me.

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Army of Angels September 7, 2014

What a great idea, Kim! Looking forward to it! Scott-thank you for sharing your experience!

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happinessweekly September 7, 2014

Fantastic idea, Kim!
It helps a lot to draw inspiration from people who have been through it and to see they are surviving and thriving, particularly from something as traumatic as Narcissistic abuse. Thank you so much, Scott for sharing.

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Anonymous September 7, 2014

It is so difficult surviving each day with the narcissist, they never tire of their game and their abusiveness is so cruel. I have moved so many times. He breaks into my house and takes whatever he wants. He has so traumatized the dog. He seems to thrive on death and makes it whatever he does. Everything is in a state of suffering, the plants are dying, and me and the dog – we are what is left, and he attacks the both of us. I come home and the dog is crying, he has been hurt. This idiot can gather so many people to his cause of perversion, immorality and criminality. I am left in a state of disgrace by each and every act he commits against me. He is driving into suicide. He has literally starved me to death. If I am to live than I will have to pick an animal in nature and learn how they survive and hide from the inhuman monster, cause being a human being and living like one is more impossible by the minute, nay, second. How the perverts and the evil took over I will never wonder, just only why did not any one care to make it stop.

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betternotbroken September 6, 2014

I hope you continue to heal and find clarity Scott! Yes, it does seem like NC has a short term price, and the emphasis is on short term. I need to remember that as re-I build my life from nothing and want everything fixed by tomorrow. Good luck to you.

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artistheart2014 September 6, 2014

Thank you Kim! I’m finding myself more interested in stories of healing and messages of hope rather than the sad stories. So valuable to me in the beginning of this journey to feel validated. Would especially love to hear about people who did t find it took them “10, 5 or even 1 year” to be remotely free Thanks Janet

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